The Screaming Nice Guy

I took part in a workshop: about 18 women and 12 men played in a very interactive, energetic inquiry as to the nature of sexuality and how it lives or does not live in each of us.

In one moment, our brilliant facilitator noticed that there was a “men vs. women” dynamic showing up in the conversation, so she invited us to make it more real and play it out. All the men stood on one side of the room and all the women on the other. “Let out all the judgments you have about the other sex — say it to the people across from you now!”

A flurry came from the men, angry and pissed. Pent up rage being given permission to be expressed.

One woman grabbed a tennis racket and began pounding a pillow, screaming a wild, ”Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!”

I got annoyed. This felt like a battle and I judged her as weak.

And I faced a part of myself as I remained frozen: the nice guy…

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About Matthew Sloane

Matthew Sloane is the artist and author of 'Tulie's Garden', an illustrated story about his inner journey from boyhood to manhood.'